


Six Hundred & Sixty Six Ways

by hornsbeforehalos



Series: The Conquests of Sweethearts [5]
Category: HIM (Band)
Genre: Castle Bam, F/M, HIM - Freeform, Happy Ending, Heartagram, Language, Norman Reedus smut, References to Cheating, Smut, Ville Valo Smut, helsinki
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-06
Updated: 2018-01-06
Packaged: 2019-02-28 10:30:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13269561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hornsbeforehalos/pseuds/hornsbeforehalos
Summary: The love of her life- Finnish Rockstar, Ville Valo- broke her heart when his need for affection led him to another woman’s bed while Kuolema was out of the country working for his best friend. 5 years after leaving him and serving him with a divorce decree he refuses to sign, she finds her way back in her homeland of Helsinki, seeing him for the first time at his beloved mother’s funeral. Her heart broken all over again, she sought comfort from an acquaintance of her brother’s, finding herself as another Conquest of Norman Reedus. Now back in America and continuing her work for Bam Margera, she’s faced with dealing with her boss’ best friend when he comes to visit. Dead set on getting her back again, Ville will do whatever it takes in order to be able to once again call her his wife.-side story to TCoNR and Whiskey, Sweetheart.





	1. Tears On Tape

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a side story to the series, following after Norman's conquest with Kuolema, (That chapter of that series is chapter two of this) but needed to happen for parts that will occur in Whiskey, Sweetheart, the sequel that is in the works over on Tumblr that won't be over here until it's completed in a few months. 
> 
> I do not own any of the real-life people portrayed in this work of fiction, and I mean no disrespect. 
> 
> Don't post my work anywhere, I'll find you.

It wasn’t just the fact that Helsinki was her home. It harbored a lot of emotions for her, a lot of memories that made it hard to return to. When she received the call that her grandmother’s best friend had passed, the only person she allowed to tie herself to that place, that city, those memories, she ignored the ache in her chest and boarded the first plane that left Pennsylvania and took the 12 hour trip to her homeland. She knew this would be difficult, she just happened to underestimate  _how_  difficult it would be.

   She had kept herself composed as she said her hellos and salutations to people she’d either never met or never had the opportunity to remember, giggling at their tales of her baby-days and stories of Anita and Ansa, her Finnish fumbling after years of misuse and abandonment as she answered as many questions as her tired mind would translate for her.   
  
   She let a couple tears spill as she embraced Kari, his old, worn eyes brightening at the sight of her mother’s features drawing him back to a distant time.  
  
   "My Angel of Death!“ he spoke in English, his accent thick with his tears as they spilled over as his brittle limbs encased her.   
  
   "Pappa Kari, it’s good to see you, I’m…” she attempted, but her voice broke as she wrapped her arms around his frail frame.  
  
   "Shhh, child, thank you for being here,“ He soothed, his protectiveness of her shining through his despair, "I hoped you would come.”  
  
   She smiled at him through her tears, wiping her eyes as she let a small chuckle, “God, I should have come back sooner.”  
  
   "I understand, Angel, I understand" he promised, rubbing her back as he watched her with adoration.   
  
   Her resolve was finally cracked when  _he_  walked through the doors of the old funeral home, not noticing at her at first as he embraced his family and friends. Her heart stopped, and his father held onto her a little tighter, feeling the tension sink into her skin as the goosebumps flooded her flesh. He finally turned his attention to his father, his eyes instantly flickering from his face to hers as he stopped in his tracks.   
  
   He looked basically the exact same as the last time she’d seen him, maybe just a little bit more withered in his older age. The beanie on his head fit him snugly as he pulled it down further upon his head with his finger-less-gloved hands before clearing his throat and continuing on the short journey to her and his father’s sides.   
  
   "Kuolema,“ He greeted, letting the fake smile plaster across his face easily as he spoke her name while he approached before wrapping his long arm around her small shoulders and pulling her to his side. He smelled the same as he always did, mint, coffee, and cigarettes, and she wanted to stab herself in the chest at the feeling of her heart strings being tugged.   
  
   "Ville, it’s good to see you,” She rasped in her native tongue, her mind reverting back to her origin as she fought the continuation of her tears at the sight and smell and feel of him. She could tell he was uncomfortable himself, her perfume lingering in his nostrils like a tease of fine wine. He smiled down at her from his tall height, rubbing her arm for good measure before releasing him and returning his attention to his father.   
  
   The rest of the evening was a blur as she let herself be pushed and prodded back and forth between the small groups of people lingering in the area around the coffined body. 

* * *

[Originally posted by models-in-motion-gifs](https://tmblr.co/ZxP3Ml2MSRqcs)

   She was leaning against the side of the building, smoking a cigarette when she heard his voice again.   
  
   "How have you been, love?“ he spoke in English, his beautiful words flooding her mind as they trailed past his lips. He propped himself beside her as he lit his own cancer stick and inhaled deeply.

   "I’ve been good, darling,  yourself?” She replied nonchalantly, hoping that her heart didn’t betray her mind through her voice.   
  
   "Learning.“ he answered cryptically, nodding his head as he inhaled again.  
  
   "That’s always a goal.” She nodded herself, turning her gaze from his profile illuminated by the city lights back to the street.   
  
   "Thank you for being here,“ He spoke again after a few quiet minutes, his voice choking slightly as she could practically hear the tears rolling down his cheeks as he mourned his mother’s death.   
  
   "Oh, Ville.” she soothed, flicking her cigarette as she allowed him to crumble into her arms. He wrapped his limbs around her waist and dug his face into her hair as he sobbed. She couldn’t fight her own tears back any further as she let her own body wrack with his as they leaned against the bricking of the funeral home.   
  
   "I’m sorry,“ he grunted, pulling away from her to wipe his face with his gloved hands, "Thank you so much for coming.”  
  
   "You knew I’d come, Ville,“ She smirked through her own tears, wiping her nose with her sleeve.   
  
   "I honestly didn’t’, love. Since the last time….God. You still look exactly like you did the last time I saw you.” he sighed, vibrant green irises flicking in the neon.  
  
   "Yeah," She snorted sarcastically, remembering the last time she’d been apart of his life. "Except this time, there are no paparazzi to get my tears on tape for their amusement.


	2. Killing Loneliness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If you've already read conquests, you can skip this (it's just Kuolema's chapter from that series) If you haven't, well, enjoy some Norman Reedus smut. (NOTE: This chapter is in first person POV instead of third. )

“Oh my God! That’s Lema! Jyrki, look, it’s Lema! LEMA!” I heard as I entered the bar, internally groaning at myself for knowing better than to come here. 

“What are you doin’ here, love?” My brother, Jyrki beamed, crossing the table to sweep me into his arms. I gasped when his smile registered and hugged him tightly, missing his familiar warmth and the strength of his arms around me. 

“Came to check on Pappa. I didn’t see you at the funeral.” I answered, frowning at the man as I sat down beside my other brother, Jussi, across from a handsome man who I didn’t recognize. 

“We were there earlier. I couldn’t really stay long, you know.” Jussi answered for his brother, soft, solemn smile quirking his face as he looked down at me. I nodded my head in response, they had always been very close with Ville’s family. 

“This is Norman, Kuolema. Norman, this is my dear sister, Kuolema Valo.” Jyrki introduced, gesturing between the man sitting across from me and my self. I narrowed my gaze at him at the use of my last name as I outstretched my hand to Norman’s waiting one, his pretty crystalline eyes smiling at me.

“Mrs. Valo.” Norman greeted, hand raising my own to his lips for a quick kiss.

 I smiled, slightly blushing at him as I replied, “Just Kuolema, please. Valo won’t be my last name for much longer.” I shifted my gaze from Norman’s mesmorizing irises to conitue my glare at my friend, earning me a smirk in silent reply.

“Getting married?” Norman asked, curiosity in his voice. Jussi barked out a laugh from his place beside me. 

“Divorced.” I answered before leaning over and stealing Jyrki’s glass of Vodka and downing it quickly. 

“Hey woman, get your own!” He growled, glaring at me with his teeth bared playfully.

“Don’t mind if I do.” I snorted, standing up from the table and making my way to the bar. 

“I’ll get that for you,” Came a voice from behind me. Turning around I was met with Norman’s smiling face as he leaned against the side of the bar beside me. 

“Well thank you, Mr…”I trailed off.

“Reedus, but please, just call me Norman.” he replied.

“Reedus? You’re from that zombie show aren’t you?” Flashes of seeing the name scrolled across Bam’s TV jogging memories.

Norman chuckled but nodded his head, elbow resting on the counter top to cover his face with his hand, “Yeah. You don’t watch it?”

“Um, sorry. Not really. My boss does though.” 

The bartender finally approached us and I rattled off what I wanted before Norman placed his own order. He listened as I spoke my pleasantries in Finnish to the old bar-keep, the man having ran the establishment since I’d been a little girl. 

“Your voice is so beautiful.” He mumbled once we’d received our drinks and were headed back to the table.

“Do you speak Finn, Norman?” I questioned as I took my seat.

“Ha! No. Um, I can speak a little bit of a few other languages, but never picked up on Finnish.” 

“Ha! I’m surprised Lema here can even say Hello in her tongue anymore, after all these years hiding in America!” Jyrki teased, scrunching his nose at me.

“I’m not hiding, Jyrki. Shut the fuck up.” I gritted, flipping him off as I sipped the strong liquor in my glass.

“Did you see him tonight?” Jussi chimed in, throwing his arm around me and pulling me into his side. My eyes flicked to Norman for a second before back to Jyrki.

“Yes, mulkvisti, I did.” I retorted hotly, rollng my shoulders to get out of Jussi’s grasp. The man responded by poking me in my ribs.

“How did that go?” 

“I haven’t seen him in 5 years and recently served him with divorce papers. His mother recently died. About as well as to be expected.” I answered, eyes shifting down to fight back the tears that were attempting to well up again. Jussi could of course sense it, as he tended to do with these things, and threw his arm back around me and pushed his shot glass infront of me with a smile. 

“Drink, Enkeli. Tervetuloa kotiin.” He rasped, kissing the top of my head. Norman raised his glass in salutation and everyone else followed suit. 

 

* * *

[Originally posted by we-love-flandus](https://tmblr.co/Z-GBet2QQplh-)

Norman was surprisingly the only one who was able to keep up with my drinking, and by the end of the evening was still fairly coherent, even after we finished a whole bottle of Vodka. I had pulled myself away from the belligerent men I called my brothers and stumbled my way outside for a smoke when a random man approached me, leaning against the wall uncomfortably close. 

“How are you doing this evening, love?” He rapsed in Finnish, Estonian accent thick with his words as his green eyes danced over my frame. He ws obviously drunk, swaying back and forth as he watched me light my cigarette. 

“I’m fine, Thank you.” I replied back, polite smile forced as I wished he woudl just go away.

“Ya know, a beautiful woman like yourself shouldn’t be out here all alone, things…happen.” he whispered, arm drunkenly extending itself out to slither around my waist and bring me closer. I coudl already smell the alcohol on him from where I’d been standing, but up closer the stench was so severe that it almost made me vomit all over his pervy little face.

“I’d appriciate it if you’d remove your hand from me, sir.” I stated firmly, tugging his arm off me and stepping back.

“Oh come on, love, let’s have some fun.” The man smirked, stepping closer again. 

“Everything alright?” was suddenly drawled in English from behind me, the man’s head jerking up at the sound of an American accent.

“This is your boyfriend?” he asked in Finnish, smirk reappearing as he eyed Norman up and down, sizing him up.

“Yes.” I hissed in English, turning on a bright smile as I stepped back into Norman’s personal space, “Play along,” I whispered to him.

Norman got the hint, thankfully, and curled an arm possesivly around my shoulders and drew me into his side. Taking full advantage of the little charade, he let a hand wrap around the back of my neck to pull me into a chaste, but lingering kiss before turning back to the brute still standing there, “Gotta problem?”

I repeated the words to the man in Finnish, quriking an eyebrow as I waited for his response. I coudl taste Norman on my lips, vodka and cigareetes familiar but enticing all the same. I hummed as the man shook his head in a universal ‘no’ motion before turning around and finding some other young girl to bother. 

“Thank you, Norman.” I said, gently pulling myself out of his grasp. 

“No problem, sweetheart. Seems like every country’s got their creeps, huh?”

“They’re not as bad as in America, but yes, still…creepy.” I replied with a light laugh, pretending to shiver in digust. Norman chuckled back, lighting up his own smoke as he looked into the flashing lights of the street. 

“You leavin’ soon? Jussi and Jyrki are pretty smashed but it seems like they’re gonna be here all night. Waiting on their friend Villie or Willie or someone to pick them up I guess.” 

I snorted at the improper pronunciation of my soon-to-be ex-husband’s name, shaking my head as I lowered my eyes to the ground, “Yeah, I’m staying at the hotel down the street.” 

“The one that starts with a P that I can’t prounounce?” Norman asked with a laugh.

“Ha! Yes. That one.” I replied, nodding my head wiht a smirk.

“I”m staying there too. I could walk you?” Norman suggested with a sly smirk bubbling under the innocent facade. 

I gave my own coy smirk back at him, narrowing my eyes with a suspicious look that made him bark out a laugh, “I promise I’m not a creeper.” 

“Definately something a creeper would say, don’t you think, Darling?” Ville suddenly spoke behind me, the deep rumble of his voice instantly pissing me off. 

“Haista vittu, Ville.” I spat, spinning around at him and glaring. Norman’s arm instantly reattaching itself to my waist at the thought of another potential problem.

As if they’d been standing at the door waiting on Ville to approach, my brothers decided it would be a good time to exit the bar, basically falling out the entry way in their drunkenness, causing both Norman and Ville to rush forward to catch them. 

“It’s Willieeeeee!” Jussi screeched, arms reaching forward and encasing his bestfriend around the shoulders.

“Normie, Normie, Normie, This is Ville”-Hiccup- “This is Kuo-Kuo-Kuolema’s” -hiccup- “Husband!” Jyrki slurred.

“Ex-husband.” I clarified harshly.

“Not yet, love. I still haven’t signed those bloody papers yet.” Ville chuckled, directing Jussi to where he’d pulled his car up to. 

Norman helped Ville push the two men into the backseat before stepping away to wait on me while smoking another cigarette. 

“Are you going walking with the American or would you like a ride back  _home_?” Ville asked, green eyes flicking from mine back behind me to where I assumed Norman was standing. 

I snorted in disgust at his use of the term ‘home.’ His house hadn’t been my home since I found him in bed with that stupid whore of a woman. 

“I’ll walk.” I seethed, turning on my heels and grabbing Norman’s hand, surprising him as I drug him away from the bar.

 

* * *

[Originally posted by ofallingstar](https://tmblr.co/Zs26mu28I0nFX)

“So your ex seems like a stand up guy.” Norman quipped as we walked down the street to the hotel.

“Absolutely delightful, isn’t he?” I chuckled back, giving him a side eyed smirk. 

“Seems like there’s some tension there, though, I’d say.” 

“Just a little.” I replied, not really wanting to go into the details of it.

Thankfully Norman seemed to not want to  _hear_  any of the details of it, and we continued our walk in peaceful silence until we approached the old hotel. We stumbled our way up the stairs, laughing at each other’s clumsiness as the alcohol took back over when we stepped into the warm air of the lobby. I had to hold onto him a couple times to keep him from tipping over as we approached my room.

“This your room?” Norman giggled, pointing to my door.

“Yes.” I replied back with my own giggle.

“That,” He pointed to the door across the way from mine, “Is my room.”

“Well, look at that, neighbors for the night.” 

“Your leaving?” Norman asked, brows furrowed in an almost-pout.

“Tomorrow, yes. Back to Pennsylvania.”

“Oh, well, that’s cool. I guess it was nice meeting you.” Norman nodded, smile encroaching his eyes as he leaned forward to wrap his arms around me and kiss my cheek. He started to pull away but I caught his arm with my forearm.

“Hey Norman?” I breathed, suddenly feeling very nervous of what I was about to ask. After seeing my brothers and seeing Ville, I needed an escape from what I’d spent the last 5 years of my life running from. I needed to remind myself that I wasn’t apart of this place anymore. That my life was different now.

“You want to…come inside?”

Norman blinked at me for a second, registering what I said, I suppose, before swallowing thickly and nodding his head. 

My hotel room was small, but contained a mini-bar and a california king bed, so I really coudln’t complain. Norman shrugged off his jacket and scarves while I proceeded pouring us a drink. 

“So what brings you to Helsinki, Mr. Reedus?” I questioned, sauntering over to where he’d taken a seat at th edge of the bed to join him, handing him his glass as I sat down. 

“Doing an art show at the University. I’ve met Jyrki and Jussi a few months back on another project.” he replied before taking a sip of the stout liquor I’d poured him, “What about you?”

“The funeral. I try to avoid this place at all costs.” I chuckled, looking down to where my hands were fidgeting withthe glass, “Too many bad memories here.”

“You grew up here?” 

“Yes, but when I started working for Bam I flew back and forth between here and the states while Ville and I were….still together… until I found him with…” I trailed off, not wanting to finish the statement as the memories made me see red. 

“He looked smarter than that.” 

I snorted, “He’s not, apparently. Too big of a romantic to be able to wait for his wife to come home.”

That’s not romantic, that’s selfishness.” Norman stated, shaking his head in disguist.

“Yeah well, shit happens, I guess, huh?” I replied, downing the rest of my drink before watching Norman do the same. 

We stared at each other for a few moments, neither of us really sure of what to say or do.

“So…”Norman started, but trailed off. 

“So…are you going to Kiss me again, Norman?” I asked, propping my elbow on my knee to hold my chin up with my knuckles. 

Norman gulped, a cute little motion before letting a wide gin splitting his face. He took the glass out of my hand and placed it on the side table before wrapping his hand around the back of my neck and pulling me into another sweet kiss. His other hand snaked around my waist, nervously pulling me closer to him as I leaned us both back on the mattress. The kiss deepended as he opened his mouth against mine, breathing heavily against my lips, encouraging me to push my tongue past his teeth to dance with his. 

He rolled over on top of me, his chest prest against mine as our tongues dominated each other’s mouths. He gripped my hip with bruising fingers, pulling an involentary whimper from my lips as his body rutted against mine. 

“Fuck” I moaned, eyes rolling back into my head as his lips worked their way down my jawline to my neck, sucking and licking at my sensitive flesh and making me writhe below him. 

“You want this?” He rasped, breaking away for a second to look me in the eyes for confirmation. I took a second to make the decision, the fresh cuts on my heart bringing Ville to the front of my thoughts for a moment before I swallowed all memories of him down and focused on the beautiful man waiting on my answer. I exhaled the breath I didn’t know I’d been holding and nodded. Not giving me the chance to change my mind, his tongue isntantly went back to attacking mine as his hands found their way under my shirt, moving to pull it off with one hasty motion. My fingertips found the hem of his own shirt and began to pull it up, and he raised himself off of me to help me rip it over his shoulders. My eyes raked down his chest, smirking at the tattoo.

“Your own name?”

“My dad’s.” He replied, latching his mouth onto the cleavage that spilled out of my bra as his arms snaked around me to lift me up to unclasp it. 

“Fuck,”I repeated again as his tongue raked along my hardening nipple, a groanof pleasure rumbling past norman’s lips and into my flesh as he continued his assault downward.

[Originally posted by sensualkisses](https://tmblr.co/ZHBgvh2A9hBYh)

Once he got low enough he started working on the button of my pants, easily undoing it before looking back up to my face for one final question of consent. I nodded my head eagerly, earning me another smirk from him as he began pulling the slacks over my hips. He made quick work of my panties before pulling back again, unbuckling his belt while hungrily devouring me wiht his lust blown eyes. 

“You’re so fucking beautiful.” He panted, throwing himself back ontop of me once he was down to just his black Saxx boxers, tossing a foil-wrapped condom onto the pillow beside me. His arm wrapped back around my waist and he flipped us over, my thighs adjusting to straddle his hips and grind down onto him, my heat dampening the fabric separating us. 

“Fuck, look at you.” He drawled, hands groping at my heavy breasts as he pushed his groin into me, enticing another mewl past my lips. I leaned forward and kissed him again, biting his lower lips and lifting my self off of him so he could push the last article of clothing away from his body. 

He made quick work of rolling on the latex before shifting my hips and pulling me down so he could push into my body with a deep growl. My head instantly rolled backwards and a wail left me as the needy want deep inside me took over and I began to rock against him. 

“Vittu minulle, Norman.” I rasped, my ecstasy making English almost impossible.

“I have no idea what the fuck you just said, but whatever it was was hot as fuck.” Norman gasped in reply, fingers pinching and tweaking my nipples as I began to lift up and down ontop of him with a faster pace. 

“Fuck me, Norman.” I repeated, making sure to speak the correct language as I bounced on his thick cock. 

“Yes fuckin’ ‘mam.” He retorted lowly, gripping my hips with another bruising grasp as he began bucking up into me as fast as his body would allow. I matched his thrusts with grinds of my own, earning me grunts and mewls from the man below me. “Ride that cock, princess. You look so fuckin’ good on my dick.” 

“Norman!” I keened, raking my hand through my hair to push it away from my sweaty forhead. I could feel the pressure in my core coiling around itself, ready to snap the tension at any second as he continued to work me over. 

“Yeah, girl, yeah.” He growled, suddenly flipping us back over and throwing my leg over his shoulder in one smooth stroke. The new angle dug him in deeper, pulling more powerful and drawn out wails from me as he thrust over and over, sweat glistening across our skin and melting us into one another. 

“I’m about to come,” I keened, each snap of his hips rubbing against my clit and sending my body into a frenzy. Tingles shot through my veins as the pleasure took over, a loud, full-bodied scream forcing it’s way out of my chest that sound something similar to his name. His hips stuttered in time with the flutter of my squeezing walls, following after me in release. He grunted in time with his off-kilter thrusts until he collapsed on top of me with exhaustion.

“Holy Hell,” Norman panted, rolling off of me to dispose of the condom into the trashcan by the bed. I instantly started giggling.

“What’s so funny?” He asked, confused at my reaction.

I snorted a couple of times before composing myself, “Sorry, I’m not laughing at you.”  _-Another giggle-_ “It’s just, I haven’t done that in years!”

“What? Sex, or a one night stand?” He chuckled, climbing back into bed and arranging the sheets over us.

“Both!” I confessed, pulling the sheet up over my cheeks to hide my embarrassment.

Norman’s eyebrows shot up and his eyeballs looked like they might actually pop out as he choked, “Wh-What?! No fuckin’ way.”

I nodded, looking up at him sheepishly with my face still covered. He shook his head as he placed his arms behind it, looking down at me from where he lay with a disbelieving smile. 

“You’re staying, right?” I asked suddenly, not wanting to be alone after the evenings festivities just yet. 

“You want me to?” He asked back, quirking an eyebrow, disbelieving look still plastering his face.

“Look, I know I just met you. I’m not trying to do the whole ‘Be with me forever’ groupie bullshit I’m sure you deal with. I understand what this is, and I hope you do too,’ I spoke softly, placing my hand on Norman’s chest, to which he covered with his own, “This felt good, though, I will admit. Being with someone, killing the loneliness, if you will. So If you don’t mind…”

Norman didn’t answer, just simply turned off the dim light and let me snuggle into him, his warm embrace comforting me through the night. 


	3. Razorblade Kiss

##  **_A few months later..._ **

“Leeeeemmmmmaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Wake the fuck up, bitch!” Was sounded through the hallway leading to her room, followed by the loud high pitched squeal of an air-horn while shit was apparently being thrown at the bedroom door. Groaning, Kuolema crawled out of her warm sheets, grumbling under her breath about how she was going to kill the anarchists on the other side of the barrier while scratching her head, successfully making her already frazzled bead head even worse. 

“Fuck do you want, Bam?” she rasped as she jerked the door open to find her boss with his fist raised like he was about to bang on the door again, the other hand gripping a red-handled air-horn.

“Get up! We got shit to do today!” He exclaimed, blowing the horn again and making her wince. It was her day off for Christ’s sake. 

“What in all that is Holy do I need to do today besides sleep, Brandon?” She griped, her arms crossing over her chest as she ignored the growl and squint coming from him at the use of the name. He knew she wasn’t a morning person. 

“Help me clean, duhh! I’ve got company comin’ in and this place is a shit hole.” Bam replied grabbing her by the arm and pulling her into the hallway and down the steps towards the kitchen.

“I’m not your fuckin’ maid, Bam.” She complained, jerking her arm away from him and pointing a finger in his direction, “You made this bloody mess, now you clean it up.”

“I made you coffeeee.” Chris sang as he came in through the kitchen door caring a large box of god-knew-what, gesturing with head, “Just the way you like it and everything.”

“See, Raabio’s got you covered for pep and all. I need help with the kitchen, Lem. Nikki’s not back for a while and you know how I am with dishes.”

“You’re disgusting is what you are.”

“You love me though, right?” He cooed, puckering out his bottom lip and pouting at her. She sighed through her nose, her mouth sinched together in a annoyed line before she flipped him off and made her way to the cupboard to find a clean coffee mug.

“Fucking  _huora,”_  she muttered under her breath as she took a seat at the kitchen island, sipping the dark caffeine and waiting for it to wake up her senses more, “I hate you all.”

“We love you too Lemmy,” Raab replied with his cheesy smile, skipping over to her and placing a scruffy, sloppy kiss on her cheek.

 

* * *

 

The doorbell sounded later on that afternoon, after she and the rest of the boys finally were able to make the house look some what presentable. Bam really needed to have a maid. 

“Lemz, can you get that?” Bam shouted from somewhere in the home, the source exactly undetectable from where she lay lounging on the couch in the living room reading.

With a heavy sigh and a roll of her eyes, Kuolema closed the book in her hands and drug herself out of the comfort of the cushions. Her bare feet were chilled by the hardwood flooring as she made herway to the grand entrace of the ‘castle,’ a woof of air leaving her as she pried the large door open.

There, of course, standing in front of her,  was the last person she’d wanted, or expected to see- Her husband.

“Jumalauta,” She cursed as her blue eyes widened, her body instantly tensing under his blistering gaze. His emerald irises were the size of golf balls as he choked out a cough of surprise.

“Lemmy, uh, how are you, love?” Ville rasped, his voice deep and thick like molasses as he regained his composure. 

“Fine,” She snapped, quickly turning on her heels and making her way back into the house to search for and slap the shit out of Bam.   

She knew he’d followed her inside, the boom of the door closing behind him resonating through the large mansion. She marched into his office where she found him going through his emails, his phone pressed to his ear as he spoke with someone about an upcoming event. She snatched the phoen out of his hand, shouting that he would call him back before slamming the phone on the desk and unleashing a series of slaps to Bam’s body that he could only sit there and take. 

“Woah woah woah, girl, calm down!” He begged as he held his hands up in defence until she stopped, her hair frazzled and just as crazy as the rage boiling through her eyes. 

“Fuck you, Brandon. I hate you.” She seethed as she spun around and stomped out of the room, her shoulder knocking the bag out of Ville’s hand when she passed him as he stood in the doorway. 

“She seems happy to see me, Bammy.” Ville chuckled as he made his way to his friend and slapping him on the back with a hug. 

“She’s gonna be jumpin’ for fuckin’ joy whens he finds out that you’re her roomskie for the week too.” Bam giggled back, devious look in his eye.

“You’re paying for my funeral if I mysteriously come up murdered, friend.” 

* * *

 

 

 

The roar that emitted from Kuolema’s throat when Bam told her about the sleeping situations was something that would make Simba’s roar at the end of The Lion King sound like a baby kitten. There were huffs, there were puffs, and April Margera was almost completely positive that Kuolema would have blown the whole house down if she hadn’t thrust a almost half-full bottle of Vodka into the Finnish woman’s hands and told her to take a walk. Bam was actually scared for his life. 

She was folding laundry in her bedroom, a bit more than slightly drunk after consuming about half of the remaining liquor, when Ville finally had the courage to lean against the door jamb and attempt to get her attention.

_“What do you want, Ville?”_ She rasped in their native tongue, annoyince deep in her voice as she didn’t bring herself to look at him. 

_“Just putting my luggage away, love, is that okay?”_ He retorted back, his own little bite to his tone.

“Whatever.” She mumbled as she picked up the stack of pants and put them in her closet, followed by the shirts.

“How have you been?” He asked as he placed his thing in the corner of the room, shrugging off his jacket and beanie.

“Peachy.” She answered shortly. 

Ville sighed, he knew the last time he’d seen her he’d been less than pleasant withher as well, especially upon seeing her draped over the American friend of Jussi and Jyrki when he came to pick them up. Tucking a piece of hair behind his ear, he sat on her bed and waited for her to go off on him like he knew she would.

  


[Originally posted by mikaeled](http://tmblr.co/ZKDmtx2Sf149Z)

 

“Why are you even here, Ville? You haven’t seen Bam in ages and you know I live here. Arent’ you on tour? Shouldn’t you be up some fans skirt somewhere in Germany or something?” She prodded after a few moments of intense silence. Ville sighed again as he scrubbed his face, his eyes closing for a moment to settle his nerves. 

“Tour’s on break right now, had the week off after our last show in New York, figured I’d come say hello since, like you said,  _I haven’t seen Bammy in ages.”_

“And let me guess, you told him not to tell me you were coming?” She inquired with a raised brow.

“Well, I...”He started, looking around the room at anything but hers, “I wanted the chance to get to speak with you, love.”

“We have nothing to discuss besides you sighning those blasted fucking papers, Ville.”

“Surely we have more to discuss than that, Lema.” He gasped, head cocking back in offence, “You’re still my wife.”

“On paper, but I haven’t been your beloved bride since the day you decided to fuck another cunt because she was nearby.” She hissed, her voice trembling as he watched tears threaten to spill at the memories. 

“Kulta, I-” Ville started, but clamped his mouth shut when he knew he didn’t have the right words. He watched her wipe her watery eyes and look off out the window as she sighed deeply to control herself. 

“All I wanted in a man was you. You were my definition of perfect, my soulmate. My forever.” She said softly, still staring blankly out the glass and into the yard, “My entire life was shattered, and you didn’t even seem to care. You let that vile woman into our bed,  _my_  bed, like I was just another wisp in the wind. And you blamed it all on me.”

He watched the tears fall down her cheeks, just like they had the night she left him. He stood from his place on the mattress and walked around it, standing behind her but with enough room to give her space. 

“You told me I was gone too much, that I worked too much, that I went to school too much. Like I was supposed to stop what I wanted to do with my life, what I wanted my life to become  _with you_ all so you wouldn’t stray away from me. All the romantic promises, all the songs you wrote for me were all lies that you let slither from your tongue just so you wouldn’t be lonely.”

“That’s not true, love.” He whispered, stepping a bit closer to her as his need to wrap his arms around her and comfort her started to take over, “I was foolish, I was young and stupid and ignorant and the worst man in the world, but everything I’ve ever said to you, wrote for you, has been from the bottom of my heart.”

“I hate you,” She whispered, tears still flowing freely as she turned to face him, their body heat gathering between them at their closeness. 

“I love you,” He whispered back, taking the chance at letting his hand find her waist to reel her into him. Her body reacted naturally, as it always had, and collapsed into his chest, her head resting against the hard bone under his shirt as she clung to him. 

She shifted her head and leaned away, looking up to him as he cupped her face in his large hand, his thumb wiping away the streams down her cheek. There was no stopping him even if he’d tried, his other arm wound itself around her back and he bent down, his chapped lips colliding with her sweet ones in a kiss that sent sparks through the both of their bloodstreams. Her eyes squeezed shut tightly as her arms found his shoulders, her mouth parting to let his invading tongue dance with her own. It was like a razor blade to her heart, slicing the walls she’d built up against him into tiny pieces. They broke away from each other slowly, her eyes opening as he peered down at her with sparkling candy apple irises.

“I love you,” He repeated, his thumb of the hand holding her face caressing her cheekbone again. 

She let out an overly exaggerated sigh at him, a smirk playing across her lips as he grinned at her.

“I love you too, you bastard.”


	4. Love You Like I Do (Finale)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> smut warning. :)

She giggled at something he’d said, though her hazy mind couldn’t let her remember what it was. All she knew was that the deep rumble of his voice and the dopey smile on his face gave her a feeling inside that she hadn’t felt in half a decade. 

“Well look at you two sleezes, sleezin’ it up.” Bam teased as he entered the kitchen where they were sitting, a half empty bottle of wine and two glasses on the table between them. He let out a snort at their obvious inebriation, “That didn’t take long.”

Kuolema rolled her eyes but blushed at the same time, bringing the large wine glass to her mouth to take a sip and mumble, “Your mother is the one who gave me Vodka at three in the afternoon.”

“You’re gonna pass out before midnight, love.” Ville chuckled as he tried to pry the glass from her hands, his level of intoxication matching her’s, “Come on, Enkeli, let’s go have a smoke outside.”

“Only because I know you have Finn cigarettes, Ville. But I’m keeping my glass,” She replied haughtily, snatching the stem back from him and causing the dark liquid to splash over the rim, a mauve colored stain leaking into her baby pink top.

“Ville Hermanni!” She scolded, her mouth gasping in horror as she dabbed it with a napkin, “I  _just_  bought this shirt!”

Bam couldn’t help but giggle at the location the splash had decided to land- dead center over where it was completely obvious her nipple was. And, as she usually did when she wasn’t working, she wasn’t wearing a bra. She crossed her arms over her hardened buds, her face flooding with blood as she turned red from more than just the alcohol. Ville of course couldn’t stop himself from smirking at her as his eyes traveled over her collarbones and plunging neckline, his gaze only deepening the blush. 

“I’m going to change, I’ll meet you on the patio,” She said in a huff before marching up the stairs to the bedroom they were sharing. Bam winked at Ville before finishing off her glass, swallowing it with a large gulp and made his exit.

“Be sure to use protection, Willie!” He called out as he swaggered off. 

 

* * *

 

  


[Originally posted by khiara001](http://tmblr.co/Zku-Ah2LgLuN0)

The air outside was chilly but not too cold, event though nothing could have ever compared to the weather in Helsinki anyways. Ville held the cigarette between his lips as he pulled his beanie down tighter over his ears, his nervous heart beating quickly as he waited for her.

Kuolema Enkeli Valo was was the only person in the entire world that could drop him to his knees and make him realize what a complete douche snot he’d been. She could redden his face with a quirk of that eyebrow of hers, and send his chest into a fluttering cage of butterflies with just a smirk. He hated himself for what he’d done to her, and vowed that no matter the outcome of this little stay was, he would at least make sure that they could at least stand to be in one another’s presence. And that those damn dirty, disgusting divorce papers sitting in his nightstand back at the tower would never have his name scratched on them. 

Kuolema slid out of the glass door to the patio quietly, her thick leopard print robe wrapped around her small shoulders as she stepped out. She took the offered cigarette from Ville and inhaled deeply, the smoke traveling out of her lungs as she stared out into he yard. 

“What’s on your mind, love?” He asked as he watched her sigh and flick the ashes into the wind as he took his own drag.

“You, Ville,” She rasped as she brought the smoke to her lips again, looking at him out of the corner of her eye, “You know that.”

He stepped closer to her, his chest inches from pressing up against her back, his warm breath ghosting over her neck. Her eyes closed as he wrapped his arms around her from behind, leaning down to nuzzle his face into the dip between her throat and shoulder, the soft terrycloth of her robe rubbing against his cheek. The feeling of her in his arms was something he would never forget, the scent of her hair filling his senses and making him tighten his grip around her. His emotions swirled inside him and brought tears to his eyes, the realization that he could have his love back making his heart ache terribly. The salty fluid poured from his eyelids and down into her neck, her body leaning back into his as she tossed the end of her cigarette over the railing and took him from his fingers, doing the same before turning around in his arms. Her own eyes were sparkling in the darkness as she peered up at him, her arms wrapping around his neck and tickling the hair sticking out from underneath his beanie. 

“I swear, lempii, no one will ever come between us again. I swear it on my mother’s grave.” He whispered lowly as her hand moved from his neck to wipe away the tears leaking down his face. She sniffed her own back and nodded, her eyes closing as she leaned into his chest and let him sway them back and forth. He hummed a familiar tune, the vibrations seeping through his chest and crawling into her ear that was pressed against him, “No one will love you like I do.”

 

* * *

 

  


[Originally posted by loveviral](http://tmblr.co/Zad-4o2Tg7hEo)

Their clothes left their bodies easily, an erotically natural dance that the two of them remembered vividly even after so many years. The pale skin of his chest pressed against her own as he shed her of her bra, her tightened pink nipples hardening more as his rough fingers danced over them. Their tongues explored their homelands of each other’s mouths as their jaws rocked in time with their hips before his mouth licked and nipped down to her neck. He left a dark, deep, claiming mark on the milky flesh as he worked his way south, his hot tongue tracing her breasts as his hands explored her body, igniting all the flames she thought had died out so long ago. 

“Ville,” She whimpered, her fingers clutching into the soft curls of his hair as his nose grazed her pubic bone, a sensual hum leaving his mouth as he placed an open mouth kiss over the sensitive flesh of her pussy. She gasped as his tongue swirled and sucked on her clit, her taste flooding his mouth and hardening him quickly. He moaned into her skin, his hands gripping her hips, fingertips bruising the bones as he devoured her whole. The languid laps of his tongue through her silky folds bringing shivers through her core.

His deep, dark voice rumbled against her as he rasped in Finnish,  _“I missed you, darling, my one true love.”_

 _“Oh, husband,”_ She cooed back, her jaw dropping slack as another tremble pierced through her, tears prickling her eyes again at the feeling she didn’t know she’d been missing. 

He slid a long, bony finger through her entrance, pulling another gasp from her as he curled the digit inside her to find the hidden place he loved so much. He reveled in the expression on her face as he slowly worked her over, his tongue returning to the sensual bundle of nerves to lazily lick circles around it. He felt her walls fluttering against him as he slid his finger in and out of her, the tell-tale sign of her release drawing near. 

“Let go for me, angel,” He said sweetly before returning to his ministrations, sucking on her skin as her body began to quake underneath his touch. Her hips bucked into his face as she came undone, her core quivering and writhing against him as she flooded his mouth with her taste and heat. Her hold on his brunette locks tightened as the ecstasy subsided, pulling him up her body to join his lips with hers and lap at the tangy taste of her release still loitering on his tongue. 

She felt his hardened cock push into the inside of her thigh, a moan leaving her opened mouth against his lips. He rutted his hips into hers again, the blunt head slipping through her moistened folds and enticing a rumbling growl from his vocal chords. 

“Make love to me, Ville,” She whispered breathlessly, her own hips rising to meet his as his hands tangled into her hair. 

He pushed into her slowly, filling her inch by inch and stretching her to completion. He growled again as he sunk all the way inside, the deep seeded thunderstorm of his feelings pulling a sob from his chest. 

Her legs wrapped around his waist as she pulled him to her sharply, a loud, long, crying wail leaving her as he stilled inside of her, embracing the warmth and and tightness of being as close to her as he always had wanted to be. 

His strokes were languid and smooth when he finally started moving, the drag of his cock against her walls driving him absolutely mad. He grunted out obscenities in both Finnish and English as he enveloped her, her scent and voice and heat sending pinpricks of painful love through his heart and bloodstream. 

“Fuck, Ville,” She gasped as the tip of his cock rubbed against her deepest parts, another gutteral cry leaving her as her back arched from the sheets and ground against him, bringing a smirk to play on his face as he watched her. 

“God, Kuolema,” He snarled as he felt her walls tightening around him, rolling them over to where she was on top. He kissed her swollen lips before she raised to sit up straight, her hand moving from his hair to his chest for leverage as she let herself rise and fall over him. She rocked her hips back and forth as his own palms kneaded the flesh of her breasts, her eyes closing as another coil in her abdomen began to tighten. 

  


[Originally posted by sensuous](http://tmblr.co/Z6ohxg2SxAVkg)

She moaned his name, the sound of it rolling off her tongue like a prayer to a god he was unaware of. Her nails dug into his skin as her movements quickened, the need for more spurring her on. Her voice left her in short, sharp pitches and gasps as his hands found her waist, his hips pumping into hers at a rapidly quickening pace. 

He rolled them over again and braced his hands on either side of her head, her legs spread wide for him and her nails raking down his back. All sense of rhythm and patience left the both of them as they became frantic, his face burrowing into her neck as his teeth found her pulse point. She gave a final cry of pleasure as the pain of the bite took hold, her body constricting around him as he soothed the wound with his tongue. With a final pump of his hips he found his own explosion, another sob wracking his chest as he filled her. He collapsed on top of her, both of their bodies slick with sweat as they caught their breath with sweet and lazy kisses. He looked into her pretty cerulean irises and smiled shyly as she swept a curl out of his eye, her own small grin gracing her beautiful face. 

“Rakastan sinua, minun enkeli,” He whispered softly before kissing her again and removing himself from her body, snorting at the whimper of loss she received from him. He curled his long limbs around her, though, nuzzling deep into her hair before they both drifted off to sleep. His definition of Heaven being right where he was- in her arms.


End file.
